Is this a joke?
No! This a real literary magazine for you to submit your literary Taco Bell writing. Like The Paris Review. Granta. Ploughshares. Taco Bell Quarterly.
It still sounds like you’re joking, but okay. What are the guidelines?
Taco Bell Quarterly seeks literary/creative essays, short stories, fiction/prose, poems, comics, art, one act plays, fever dreams, multimedia, stupid status updates, criticisms, manifestos, recipes and anything else that explore any and all elements of Taco Bell. Or not. Shoehorn a chalupa in your short story. Maybe we’ll love it. An elegy for the discontinued menu items? Fine. An experimental essay about marine biology and the XXL Grilled Stuft Burrito? Awesome. Review the new Beefy Fritos Burrito and how it reminds you of the time your grandma died? We want it. Something that introduces us to inventive form, dynamic language, and strong voice. Or perhaps it does none of the above. We’re not judgey and pretentious. We’re the Taco Bell fucking Quarterly. We lean towards pieces that are queer and center their pain/joy in a Taco Bell.
Are you affiliated, sponsored by, connected to, or BFF with Taco Bell?
No. But like all corporations, they are very aware of things that steal their intellectual branding. One time I asked them for a million dollars for literature in a zoom. They laughed politely and continue not to sue me.
Is this going to be quarterly?
It comes out when we feel like it.
What’s the word count guideline?
Write what it takes to tell your story. But seriously, people’s attention spans are like 500-1500 words.
When are you open for submissions?
Follow us on Twitter @TBQuarterly for open period announcements. We are looking at late Spring ’23 next.
Where do I submit?
Can I sim sub? Are there rules? Where will this be published?
Sim sub you beautiful Literary Writer. Beautiful Literary Writers retain all rights to their piece with the one time rights to publish the piece on the website.
Are you a paying market?
Yes, we can offer a $100 honorarium per acceptance.
Can I win prizes and prestige?
Probably. One of our pieces was a finalist for the 2020 Best of the Net Anthology by Sundress Publications. Johns Hopkins University won a Golden Circle of Excellence Award for writing an article about us and they were really freaking pumped about it.
Is this an astroturfed literary psy-op or what? Where are you getting money?
TBQ is funded by social media hustling, side gigs, merch sales, donations, and a personal gamble that it might be worth it one day. 100% of donations are paid to writers for their work. TBQ was built on the labor of writers, poets, artists, and strangers who just wanted to help because they thought it was cool.
Can I volunteer? Yes, we would love readers for TBQ6. Don’t be scared, hit me up. Introduce yourself. I like meeting new writers. Email firstname.lastname@example.org.
Can I donate? Please! Until a lonely billionaire who used to dream of being a poet leaves me an inheritance, we are funded by donations, merch sales, and my day job. 100% of donations are paid to writers for their work. Skip the form and contact me directly if you’re a lonely billionaire. Venmo is @ParisReview.
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