In the Red

Taco Bell is raising their prices
and I
am raising hell.
Do not deprive me of my $1.99 soft beef taco!
Do not restrain me from 5 soft beef tacos for $9.99!
Do not forsake me by charging more than $4.99 for my beloved crunchwrap supreme (beef)!
My chump change
pocket quarters
loose loonies
tried-and-true toonies
just can’t pay those taco bell orders no more.
I always assumed this wasn’t
Alberta AAA Angus beef
but I sure didn’t know I’d be paying like it was.
The cashier
aka taco artist
aka cheesy gordita goober
aka nachos supreme supplier
my nemesis.
“Your total is $14.37.
How would you like to pay?”

I wouldn’t.

“I’ll put it on credit,
thanks.”


Laura O’Brien is a freelance writer and communications aficionado based in Toronto, ON. She enjoys scrolling through Instagram, petting cats and snacking.

%d bloggers like this: